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Powerful Confessions

A man once shared with me a remarkable story.

He had been stuck in a pornography addiction, and no one knew about it. He carried the shame of it every day. Ultimately, knowing he needed to change, and in accordance with the Word of God in our key verse today, he knew he had to confess his sin to someone.

He chose to confess to his wife.

She was understandably hurt by his actions but committed to working through it. They drew closer to God, attended couples counseling, embarked on a road of radical honesty and accountability, and worked hard on their marriage. Today, they are healthy and happy.

“And,” he said, “not only is our marriage better than it's ever been—but any images or memories of the porn I saw are gone from my mind. It’s like it’s been wiped clean.”

Such is the power of confession. In our verse today, God links confession and healing together; this story is an excellent example of that promise coming to pass.

It’s the first step towards freedom and usually the scariest. But if men want to overcome lust, we must first acknowledge it—not just to the Lord, but to someone we trust (James 5:16).

Why do we need another person? Why not just confess to God alone?

Beyond simply “because the Bible says so,” I believe it’s because God knows we can’t overcome sin ourselves.

What is more, He doesn’t want us to.

From the beginning, God knew it was not good for man to be alone (Genesis 2:18). We are designed to do life with other people. We are created for community.

The blessings of community include fellowship, encouragement, love, support, and growth. When we confess our sins—not to everybody, but to someone we trust—we invite them into the struggle with us, where we can bear each other’s burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ (Galatians 6:2).

Doing so takes great humility, and our pride often stops us. But we also know that God opposes the proud, but gives His grace to the humble (James 4:6).

Most men I know, including myself, want and need that grace! Confession is one way we get there.

The first step to overcoming a problem is honestly acknowledging the problem. We are transparent about our lust, humble enough to talk to someone about it and ask for help, and committed to taking the next steps towards freedom.

It is not easy—but it is right.

Prayer: Lord, give me the strength and humility to take this step of confession in my life with someone I trust, and may I find healing and freedom as I do. Amen.

Reflection: If you don’t already have one, find a pastor, friend, or family member you trust. Whether you have one already or are finding one now, set up a time to chat with that person in your life and share your struggles with one another.