DON’T FIGHT ALONE: How Isolation Keeps Us Stuck in Anxiety and Why Community Helps Us Win Mental Battlesنموونە

When things go badly, we need others to reframe our perspectives.

In Philippians 1, Paul writes from prison - a place most would consider the epitome of "things going badly." Yet he says: "Now I want you to know, brothers and sisters, that what has happened to me has actually advanced the gospel, so that it has become known throughout the whole imperial guard and to everyone else that my imprisonment is because I am in Christ."

From a dark prison cell, Paul sees purpose. He sees the advancement of the gospel. He sees opportunity rather than an obstacle.

Paul's perspective isn't defined by where he is but by who he is set on. His circumstances haven't changed, but his view of those circumstances has transformed.

What's your view like from inside the pit?

Beth Moore once said there are three kinds of pits: the pits we jump into, the pits we fall into, and the pits we're pushed into. Some of us ended up in dark places because of our choices. Others fell in through no fault of our own. And some were pushed in by circumstances or other people.

Regardless of how we got there, we don't need someone practicing mere sympathy when we're in a pit. Job's friends stood above him in his pit of suffering and offered sympathy: "I feel bad for you as I look down." They explained how he got there, which wasn't helpful.

What's helpful is empathy - someone who loves you enough to jump into the pit with you. When you fix your mind on earthly things rather than things above and destructive thoughts defeat you, you don't need someone to analyze your situation from a safe distance. You need someone willing to sit in the darkness with you.

Ideally, you need someone who will point you to Jesus rather than to their strength or your failures.

I've found myself in various pits throughout my life, such as self-pity, despair, and discouragement. My wife called the first few years of our marriage my “angry phase.” Because I fixated on everything wrong around me, I was full of anger, cynicism, and unforgiveness. Needless to say, I was not fun to be around!

Looking back at that time, I think about the friends who jumped in with me. They didn't explain everything away or cast themselves as the heroes of my story. They walked alongside me and pointed me to the One who could deliver me. I don’t know where I’d be without people: Ann, Maxie, Karyn, and Jason.

It's impossible to tell the story of God delivering me from those pits without telling you how these friends pointed me to Jesus. They lifted my eyes from earthly things and helped me set them on things above. Because of them and God's grace working through them, I wasn't conformed to this world but transformed by the renewing of my mind.

If you're in a pit right now, you need people who will reframe your perspective—not by denying reality but by helping you see God's presence, purpose, and power in your circumstances.

And if you know someone in a pit, be the kind of friend who jumps in and points to Jesus.

On the final day of this plan, I’ll share three practical steps you can take to fight together and win the battle in your mind.