Finding Hope Beyond The FrontSample

Anger

Dawn, Army wife

The first time my husband deployed to Iraq, I found myself struggling with anger. I was angry at my husband because he wanted to deploy. He had trained for this his whole career and it seemed to be killing him to watch everyone else go instead. So now, he could barely hide his excitement.

I didn’t know what to do with my anger. I tried to explain my feelings to my husband but he didn’t seem to want to hear about them. Finally, he deployed, leaving me to deal with my anger.

I didn’t want to be angry with him, but it hung over me like a black cloud. I prayed about my anger. I gave it to God... only to pick it up again. I was on an emotional rollercoaster the entire year. 

When my husband finally returned, I was glad to have him home, but the adjustment wasn’t easy. Bonds were formed with fellow soldiers and I was an outsider – I felt anger forming over this too. I hated being on the outside, looking in. Resentment joined my anger. I think redeployment was harder than the deployment itself. 

I clung to God during all those days because I knew He knew how difficult that year was on both of us. I kept taking my anger and resentment to God and talking about it with my husband until it eventually left me for good. God healed all of my hurts.

That year, I really learned to rely on God more. 

PRAYER: Father, help me not to be rash in my anger but instead, to bring everything before You for sifting – to help me see the more appropriate ways to deal with my frailties. May Your words bring peace to my heart and mind.

PASSAGES FOR STUDY: Psalm 86; Romans 12; Ephesians 4,5