20/20: God's Vision For My LifeSample

Truth about Tears

By Rebecca Wilson

Jesus wept. John 11:35

The tornado was swift and destructive. A family lost everything they owned. And although lives were not lost, tears still flowed.

Several other families experienced the unimaginable. Murder and mayhem were now a reality for them. They personally knew injury, death, and loss beyond comprehension. And the tears endured long beyond the night.

Marriages that were torn apart by divorce produced hurt, fear, rage, and disappointment. From the wife, the husband, and the children…there were tears, so many tears.

Then there were the individuals who had been wounded in so many ways by abuse, neglect, rejection, and more. Life hadn’t treated them kindly. And tears that had been hidden, held back, refused, and denied now poured out.

I’ve sat across from all the people who experienced these tragedies, and we wept. Sometimes, when there just weren’t enough words, tears communicated the depth of what was inexpressible.

In all of these situations, I witnessed a surprising phenomenon about tears. Not all tears are from sorrow. Sometimes, right smack dab in the middle of discussing the darkest moments, laughter emerges…the kind of laughter that brings tears from the same deep place within us where despair resides.

This laughing and crying isn’t hysteria; it is God’s healing power. Ecclesiastes 3:4 states, “There is a time to cry and a time to laugh.” Who would ever expect that both would come together at the same time?

In moments of deep sorrow, there is often an immediate return of what is promised in Psalm 126:5: “Those who sow in tears shall reap in joy.” This same joy is also promised to us in Psalm 30:5: “Weeping may last for the night, but a shout of joy comes in the morning.”

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying these situations are funny. I’m saying that often—when you least expect it—God pours out a release of joy that is both appropriate and brings relief. And it can happen within seconds.

David wrote in Psalm 56:8, “You have taken account of my wanderings; put my tears in Your bottle; are they not in Your book?” This verse contains a paradox that reveals an incredible truth. The Hebrew root word for “wanderings” is nuwd which means both “to mourn” and “to skip for joy.” In other words, your tears that stem from the deepest recesses of your heart—whether from sorrow or from joy—are counted by God. He keeps each one in a bottle with your name on it. He writes about each one in His book. What an astonishing and amazing truth…our tears matter to God!

Just like we keep the things we treasure the most, God keeps what’s precious to Him…our tears. Whether they’re shed in grief or from laughing so hard our bodies ache, each one is special and precious to Him.

Tragically, we grow up hearing lies about tears—lies like: “You’re weak or emotionally unstable if you cry.” “Real men don’t cry.” “Tears don’t serve any purpose.” “Shame on you for crying.” “Tears are for babies.” These lies often prevent us from shedding the tears that could bring us healing—tears that God treasures.

And then, there are deceptive tears. The Enemy loves when we use our tears to manipulate others. We get an idea of how God feels about tears used for manipulation in Hosea 7:14: “They do not cry out to me with sincere hearts. Instead, they sit on their couches and wail.” Based on this verse, I think it would be safe to say that these tears aren’t the ones God treasures and stores.

Interestingly, those involved in the occult or Satanism aren’t allowed to show tears. Why? Because Satan knows our tears are important to God, and he does all he can to corrupt the very thing that brings healing and cleansing to our hearts and souls.

But what truth does the Enemy know about tears that we don’t realize? Why exactly are our tears so important to God?

Understanding the root Hebrew word for tears gives us a greater revelation on why they are so important. The Hebrew root word used for “tears” relates to the process where pressure is used to make wine from grapes or olive oil from olives. In other words, tears are the byproduct of pressure applied to our hearts. Just as wine results from pressure applied to grapes, so our hearts produce tears when we experience pressure.

It all comes down to our hearts. There is an extreme danger in denying or suppressing the natural process of tears. If your heart cannot produce tears under pressure—whether in sorrow or joy—it will become apathetic and hardened.

God welcomes our tears, because He knows that through them, we experience healing. In fact, the Bible tells us that Jesus Himself wept as He stood at the grave of His friend Lazarus (John 11:35). And in the Garden of Gethsemane before His crucifixion, Jesus was overwhelmed with sorrow at the knowledge of what lay before Him (Mark 14:33–34; Luke 22:44). If Jesus needed to shed tears from sorrow, how much more so do we?

Ask yourself how long it’s been since you shed tears from sorrow. How long has it been since you laughed until you cried? Both are related. If one hasn’t happened, the other probably hasn’t either! If neither occurs very often, your heart is in danger of being hardened.

Here’s a prayer to accomplish the process of producing tears: “Lord, please plug Your headphones straight into my heart. Hear my cry. I want You to know about the things that concern my heart! Let me hear Your humor. Fill me with the ability to produce tears from the pressures in my heart. Fill me with Your holy presence, and help me see all things from Your perspective.”

Tears are a sovereign remedy. They are God’s elixir—His primary choice for our healing and cleansing. Accept the truth about tears, and don’t hold them back. Instead, offer them as a form of sacrifice and worship to fill up His bottle that has your name on it.

Laughter and tears are meant to turn the wheels of the same machinery of sensibility; one is wind-power, and the other water-power; that is all.
~ Oliver Wendell Holmes

Memory Verse

Surely he took up our pain and bore our suffering, yet we considered him punished by God, stricken by him, and afflicted. But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed. Isaiah 53:4–5