Grown Up's Guide to PrayerSample

Day 2: Like This 

Prayer 

Heavenly Father, teach me to pray in order to surrender my will, not impose it. Help me want your agenda, not mine. 

Reading

In yesterday’s reading, Jesus told his disciples—and us—how not to pray. Don’t pray for the praise of others, he said, but pray in secret. God knows what we need, Jesus tells us, before we even ask which leads us to the question: Why pray? 

But Jesus prayed—a lot. He encouraged his followers to pray. So, what are we missing? Are we praying the wrong way? If you’re offended by that, then you’re exactly where Jesus wants you. He’s telling us—as he told his followers—that we don’t know what we’re doing when it comes to prayer. Does that get your attention? Jesus certainly had the attention of his listeners.

“This, then, is how you should pray.” (Matthew 6:9)

You asked for it. Here it is: 

“‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name.’” (Matthew 6:9)

First, Jesus invites us to address God on intimate terms—as our Father. He’s inviting us to something relational, personal, and non-formulaic.

As for the next part, “Hallowed be your name,” what’s that about? That’s about us needing to acknowledge who we’re addressing: the infinite God, who has invited you to call him Father. When we pause—in awe—to reflect on who God is, we gain a better understanding of who we are and why we’re here. This is where we re-center, get our bearings, and remember the broader context of our lives—our lives that are made significant not by what we accomplish but by whose image we bear and whose children we are. 

If we skip over who we’re addressing, prayer is reduced to a good luck charm or a last glance in the mirror before leaving home. It’s a wish me luck before a presentation or an exam. Our prayers become predictable and ineffectual: Dear God, thank you for this day; now here’s my list . . . have to run, Amen. If you don’t begin by experiencing some sense of wonder, you’ll be tempted to skip over what follows. You’ll resist what follows. And what follows is why we pray.

“‘Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.’” (Matthew 6:10)

Wait—God’s kingdom? His will? What about my kingdom and my will? What about my family, my job, my lack of a job, my health? What about me? 

As Jesus already explained: 

“For your Father knows what you need before you ask him.” (Matthew 6:8)

He already knows what you need. Prayer is not about convincing God to do your bidding. It’s about allowing him to move you to the place where you’re willing to do his. 

The purpose of prayer is to align your will with God’s. 

This is the very thing Jesus wrestled with in the garden of Gethsemane before his arrest and crucifixion. Jesus dreaded what was about to come. He asked if there was another way. It took all night, but Jesus came around to this:

“Yet not my will, but yours be done.” (Luke 22:42)

Do you know what hung in the balance of Jesus’s willingness to submit to the Father? You did. I did. The world did.

Jesus prayed until he could come to a place of surrender. If we’re not praying with a posture of surrender, we aren’t doing it right. 

Consider this: If you quit praying because God didn’t answer a prayer, as legitimate as that prayer was—perhaps the healing of a loved one—doesn’t that say more about your view of God than about God himself? If you’ve given up on God because of an unanswered prayer—or a series of them—that’s understandable if God is merely a divine healer waiting to be summoned, a favor distributor, or a lifeguard we call to the rescue. But what if God is bigger than that? What if his plan includes you but doesn’t center on you? 

What if prayer doesn’t begin with asking?

If you can’t earnestly pray for God’s will to be done, pay attention to that tension. Pause there and identify what’s keeping you from praying: “Your will be done.” You’ve just learned something—where God wants to work in your life.

“Your will be done.” That’s why we pray. 

So, does prayer work? That kind of prayer always does. It always works on us. Ultimately, it works for us. It puts us in our place and puts things in perspective.  

Today, when you pray, pray as Jesus instructed. Start with your heavenly Father, not you. 

Reflection

Do you have reservations about “Your will be done?" What are they? Ask God to help you get out of the way and get your heart in tune with his.