Forgiveness on the journey of life

We don’t need to carry extra baggage on our journeys to our destinies. Good self-esteem requires that you travel lightly through life. Bitterness, resentment, and hurt can become excess baggage on a long journey. On a trip to Bethlehem, I discovered the city was no longer a place of peace and joy. Sadly, it’s now full of hurt, anger, and bitterness, and it’s a hotbed of political strife.

Someone once said, “nobody gets out of this life alive.” Now that’s true and funny. I also believe that nobody will get through this life without making mistakes or being hurt by others. That’s why we need to practice the secret of forgiveness. Have you ever struggled with guilt or anger? Do you know how to forgive yourself and others? I’ve counseled thousands of people who lived with shame or bitterness—two emotions that can cripple you.

Our first five years of marriage were horrible. Denise and I were ill-prepared for marriage, children, and careers. We were contemplating divorce. In desperation, we went for counseling and learned that a good relationship requires the daily process of forgiveness. Our therapist taught us these three steps of forgiveness:

1. Step one is the act of forgiveness. It sounds like “Jesus, I forgive my dad for…”
2. Step two is the process of forgiveness. You forgive again and again until you are healed.
3. Step three is eventually reaching the state of forgiveness. The memory of the event will be there, but the emotional damage and pain will be gone.

The Bible tells us, “‘In your anger do not sin’: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.” (Ephesians 4:26-27, NIV) Jesus also taught, “‘Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.’” (Luke 6:37, NIV)

Forgiveness doesn’t set other people free—it sets you free. Be free on this journey of life because YOU are a miracle.

Your friend, Paul Marc Goulet