Healing and the Single Mom: By Jennifer MaggioSample
Isolation is a Tactic of the Enemy
I’m no stranger to pain–the pain of death, destruction, loss, financial ruin, single parenting, lost relationships. In my past, the more hurt I was, the more I wanted to run. The more I replayed the past, the more I wanted to simply stay underneath the covers and not get up in the mornings. It seemed the harder life was, the more I wanted to isolate myself from others. And life got darker …. and darker …. and darker. Thank God, I learned better.
Isolation is a tactic of the enemy. The more you isolate, the deeper your pain becomes–the larger the hole–the bigger the void. The Lord planted us in spiritual family for safety (see Psalm 68:6)!
Step 1 to Healing: Stop Isolating
The hardest thing to do when the weight is heavy and hurt is flowing is to be with people. Oftentimes, in the midst of hurting we don’t feel capable of meaningful social interactions. Sometimes, we can even feel like a burden to those around us. It’s easy to retreat and avoid human interaction. Yet, it is dangerous. Isolation is when we are most vulnerable to the attacks of the enemy. When we are weakened by hurt or heartache, the enemy’s lies become more believable. If we begin isolating, we often have a difficult time pulling ourselves from that isolation and thus get stuck in a repeated cycle of heartbreak and loneliness.
Make yourself get out of the house! You may not feel like going to that girls’ night you planned a few months ago, but go anyway. Stay connected to church, even when you fear they do not understand or care. Attend the Bible study, even if you have to go alone. Invite friends over for coffee. Engage in a game night, even when you don’t feel like it. Spend time with loved ones. Isolation is a common side effect of dealing with a broken heart. Instead of giving in to the temptation to isolate and ignore the texts from your loved ones, force yourself to respond. Go even further and schedule a time to hang out with those closest to you. Have your friends come over for a movie night or go out to grab lunch or coffee. Maybe you visit a family member you haven’t seen in a while or reconnect with an old friend. When we engage in meaningful and life-giving friendships, healing begins. Don’t delay your healing by isolating! The Lord created us for community. Wisdom will be found there. Laughter will be found there. Prayer and the laying on of hands can take place. Corporate praise can shift perspective. There is value in your natural and spiritual family!
Points to Ponder
- Have you ever gone through a period of isolation? How did this affect your faith and your friendships? Did things get better or worse?
Scripture
About this Plan
To the weary, hurting single mom–the one who feels you cannot go on and that life has been too much–you are seen. You are seen by the one, true God. While I don’t understand the depths of your pain, I know the depths of my own. And the God I serve has been a faithful healer of all my broken places, and He will surely heal yours.
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