Moving Through GriefSample

Taking a Look at Grief

Say the following statement with us: “I am here. I have survived up to this point. Today, I am going to look at my grief.”

We have been wounded, and now we have a choice to make. We can grab a cloth and attempt to stop the bleeding, or we can deny that we have been injured. Let’s apply pressure to the wound to stop the bleeding.

The first step in our grief work is to admit we have a problem. We will unpack the Three A’s to Change. The first step is to become aware. Take a moment to be aware of the hurt you’re experiencing. Invite God into the process; He will help you understand what’s in your heart that leads you away from the path of life. Consider praying the words of David in Psalm 139:23–24:

Search me, O God, and know my heart;

test me and know my anxious thoughts.

Point out anything in me that offends you,

and lead me along the path of everlasting life.

After we have become aware of our hurt, we can assess what has and has not worked to ease the pain. We can also assess other options we hope to try in the future. The final step is to act. After we have processed our pain and the ways we have effectively and ineffectively worked to meet our needs, we can begin a new course of action. We will continue to apply the Three A’s to Change throughout this plan.

In our fast-paced world, we may refuse to look at our pain, but looking away does not stop the bleeding. Or we can labor feverishly at work or home, believing success will cauterize the wound. But we do not heal a hemorrhaging limb by building wealth or vacuuming floors. We must look directly at the injury to understand how to get better. There may be dirt that needs to be cleaned out. It could be painful. We have been hurt; yet we have survived. Facing the pain is the only way to rid us of our constant suffering. Denying its existence only further deepens the injury in the long run.

So today we begin. Or we begin again. We choose to look at our hurt, to go on a journey to find hope, to liberate ourselves of the dark cloud that has followed us for days, weeks, or years now.

Today, we look at our grief.

Let's pray.

God,

I feel like I have lost so much. Give me the courage to move through my grief and face all that I'm grieving at this moment. I know you are close to the broken-hearted and understand all my difficult feelings.

Amen.

Journal:

Write a few sentences about your loss. Be specific about what you are feeling and why. It takes courage to be here, working through your grief, so be sure to give yourself compassion today.