5 Days Of Loving Others With Settle My SoulSample

Be the Kind of Friend You Are Looking For by Ruth

A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity. — Proverbs 17:17

Over coffee, a woman I had been meeting with shared her frustration over not having formed any close relationships yet. She was new to our community and still settling in. I listened patiently as she gave several examples of how she didn’t feel connected.

My heart broke for her because I know the power of friendships. In God’s eyes, friendship isn’t a luxury; it is a necessity! As we talked, I challenged her with something God had convicted me about years before. “What if instead of looking for the right friend, we started being the right friend?”

Friendships don’t always come easy. They take time. And as life gets more hectic, friendships require intentionality. We have to make time to cultivate deep and meaningful relationships. Rarely do they just come to us.

So how different would our relationships be if we stopped looking for the perfect friend? What if we stopped trying to find that person we just really clicked with? What if, instead, we led with being the right kind of friend?

We probably all have that checklist of qualities we’d love to have in a friend. It’s so easy to look for the right friend without seeking to be the right kind of friend. But friendship should start with us.

Be a friend who makes the first call.

Be the kind of friend who invites someone else out.

Be the friend who sends an encouraging text first.

Be the friend who asks questions and listens intently.

Be a friend who doesn’t expect perfection.

Be a friend at all times, constant and available.

Start by being the right kind of friend. And watch what God does.

I am convinced that many people are looking for meaningful relationships, but few are willing to be that kind of friend first. 

Don’t wait for someone else to come to you. Step out in faith today. Be the friend you are looking for!

Father, give me grace to love like Jesus today. Fill me with Your Spirit as I seek to be the right kind of friend. Help me sacrificially serve those around me and guard my heart against demanding from others what only You can give me. In Jesus’ name, amen.

How have you waited for the right kind of friendship? 

What is one way you can begin being the right kind of friend today?