See-Through Marriage By Ryan and Selena FrederickSample

Day Seven

Living in the Light

Scripture: John 8:12; Philippians 1:3–11

Creating time for each other in your marriage won’t happen by default; it must happen by design. Special dates and outings are great, but we’re referring to the moments in between—in bed before falling asleep, in the morning before starting your day, driving to and from activities, or throughout your day when an urgent matter comes up. 

This type of space is essential to living a see-through marriage. It’s this margin that allows room to go off script. It’s so easy to fill every second of every day, spend every penny, and use every last iota of energy on outside demands. It’s so easy, in fact, that as a culture we live in perpetual states of debt: time debt (too much to do and not enough time to do it), financial debt (paying later for benefits today), and complete energy debt (using caffeine and energy drinks to borrow energy as needed).

We urge you to fight culture’s pull to live an indebted life, especially when it comes to time spent conversing for the health of your marriage. Wherever you are, give yourselves the margin you need to have good conversations of substance. Turn off the distractions, say no to good things more often, simplify your financial obligations, and, in general, explore the freedoms possible in a simplified life. 

This is not easy, and it’s counter-cultural. For those reasons, it’s radical, just as having a see-through marriage is radical. But we’re not called to live like everyone else. Christ has shown us a better way—for the purpose of a see-through marriage and so much more. 

It is our prayer that as you surrender to Christ’s lordship and trust in His goodness daily you would experience deeper joys and truths for the rest of your lives together—perhaps to a degree previously unimagined. 

We really can’t overstate the beauty of living transparently alongside each other in marriage. You need not be perfect to experience the perfect love of Christ. That is the beauty of the gospel—and living in the full light of Christ’s truth is the freedom available to those who choose a fierce, see-through marriage. 

How would creating more margin in your life, particularly in the area of time, help you and your spouse live more of a see-through marriage?