Day 21

The Most Challenging

I got a call yesterday from a man in my church. He was distraught after attending a church-based recovery program. The program has been a great resource for people to find freedom from all kinds of addictions. But not pornography.

That night he said the group of seven men shared about how they had experienced freedom from drugs, alcohol, and eating disorders, but none of them could break free from pornography.

A porn or sex addiction is one of the most challenging addictions to break. There are substances that produce a higher high but none is more accessible. A drug addict has to go ‘out’ to get their substance, but a porn addict is one thought away from traveling the porn pathway in their brain.

When I went to my training to be an addiction professional, I was there with therapists and counselors from drug rehabs across the country. They had been treating substance abuse for years. Everyone that I talked to said that a porn or sex addiction was among the most difficult to overcome.

It’s important to recognize that breaking free from porn will likely be the most challenging thing you have done. This is why a holistic approach is essential. It must take into account the brain science of addiction. The challenge of breaking free is why we need the help of God and others.

It's not a quick fix. It’s worth repeating. After over 30 years of helping people break free from a porn or sex addiction, Dr. Ted Roberts says from his experience,

“less than 5% of people experience the miracle of instant deliverance. The rest have a miracle every day for months and years to gain freedom.”

Two years is what it often takes for a lifestyle of freedom to take root. Stopping unwanted sexual behavior usually happens in months, but establishing new habits and a new lifestyle takes longer. The last stronghold to be broken for most people is fantasy and masturbation.

Breaking free will require more growth, more surrender to Christ and more vulnerability than most people are comfortable with. This is an opportunity to die to yourself and lean into God like never before. If you are ready to outgrow porn, you are ready for freedom.

Today’s Challenge:  

1. Read 2 Corinthians 12:9-10.  
2. Answer the reflection questions.  
3. Check in on the Freedom Fight app. 

“But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” - 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Reflection Questions:  

1. According to v. 9, how does God’s strength/power become fully realized in Paul’s life?  
2. Paul goes on to say that he boasts in his weaknesses. What is the reason he gives for this?  
3. How would this truth apply to you in light of the challenge of overcoming a porn addiction?  
4. What is Paul’s conclusion in v. 10?

Paul’s situation was not an addiction, but the principles still apply. God’s power is perfected in our weakness because we are forced to depend on Him and His strength instead of our own. When we understand the brutal facts, it helps us lean into God and His strength like never before.

How are your holy habits?

#1 Confession
#2 Bible Reading and Prayer
#3 Use and practice BRACE
#4 Check in with accountability