How Should a Christian Date? A 5-Day Devotional by Eric DemeterSample

Day 5: Fall in Love With Your “Cheesecake”

Baking is a fascinating phenomenon. Eating eggs, flour, sugar, cream cheese, butter, and graham crackers by themselves isn’t so tasty. But mix them and put the concoction in the oven for an hour, and a delicious cheesecake magically appears. Baking a cheesecake is like forming a relationship—two people come together and bring their values, preferences, personalities, and belief systems and develop something new. 

Just like certain ingredients, why some people complement each other and others don’t is a mystery. Sometimes, couples who don’t perfectly align on paper still might create a surprisingly long and life-giving marriage. In dating, the key is to evaluate your relationship patterns as much as you assess the other person’s specific traits. Ask questions like, “Do I enjoy spending time with them?”, “Is our relationship a safe place to disagree?” and “Can I be myself with them?” In other words, you need to know not just whether you love the person but if you love you form with them—a tasty cheesecake. Similarly, you’ll have to decide not just whether or not you want to marry this person but also whether or not you want to stay in the relationship.

Additional checks: Make sure you can be yourself, your relationship can handle conflict, and you can better serve God together than if you were apart. Ultimately, you’ve found the “One” when you love your relationship. and you’re ready for a lifelong commitment.

Reflect

What are two good patterns you want to establish with your boyfriend or girlfriend to help your future marriage?

Prayer

Lord, You love marriage because you created it! Not only do I pray for the ideal person, but also for a relationship with whom I may fall in love. In your wisdom and timing, help me to take the step of faith into a lifelong commitment of marriage.