Pump It Up! Live Elated, Not Deflated Through Disappointing DaysSample

'Pier' Pressure

Another significant struggle throughout my dinghy days was feeling like they were the least fruitful and successful years of my life. For the first time since I started working at the age of fifteen, I experienced unemployment, and it felt very strange. It made me seriously reconsider what it truly means to have a fruitful and successful life.

I have learnt to reframe fruitfulness and success largely because of my amazing daughter. She teaches me so many important lessons. When she was three, I walked through the park with her, pushing her in her pram, and I bumped into a mum with her son, who was the same age as my girl. He was confidently striding alongside his mum, chatting away to her. I felt a wave of anxiety come over me - my girl was not yet walking or talking. I started thinking about all of the things she should be able to do to be ‘fruitful’ and ‘successful’ for her age.

My girl has Down Syndrome - this means she may take longer to reach certain goals, but she will get there in her own time. Comparing her fruitfulness and success to that of others in completely different circumstances is unfair and unnecessary. When I look at her as an individual, I’m incredibly proud of her phenomenal progress. She’s a highly fruity little cutie!

Similarly, if I compare my fruitfulness and success to others of my age (my piers/peers, if you will!), I can feel like I’m just not up to scratch. Many people I know are in management positions and are much younger than me. I know I’m not called to management; however, I felt like I didn’t measure up to my ‘piers’ because I wasn’t managing anything or anyone (other than how many hours per day my daughter was allowed to binge-watch 'The Wiggles'!).

I wrestled with how God appeared to be blessing others when, frankly, it felt like he had abandoned me. Other people I went through the redundancy process with very quickly got new jobs. While I was genuinely pleased for them, I also found it difficult to understand why God hadn’t done the same for me. Why provide so quickly for my ‘piers’, yet I have to remain in dinghy limbo? I had to learn to keep my eyes off my piers and to focus solely on my personal voyage with my trustworthy Captain.

Reflection

Spend time reflecting on your personal voyage, and ask God what he uniquely wants to do in your life right now. Refuse to be sidetracked by 'pier' pressure.