Angry?

Oh. My. Gosh. The Anger! Some days you can feel it coursing through your veins when you think about all the pain, challenges, and changes your divorce has caused. It’s especially troubling to feel there’s nowhere for that anger to go. It seems you’re stuck with all this grief, uncertainty, and broken pieces, and you’re angry about it!

I get it. Anger is a perfectly normal response to such a traumatic experience as divorce. But be careful, anger can take root in our hearts, lodging itself between us and God, casting a shadow that can consume us. If we don’t find a way to manage it well and let it go, anger can negatively affect our relationship with God, other people, and how we live every day.

The Bible admonishes us to be angry and sin not, and to not let the devil get a foothold in our anger (Ephesians 4:26,27). So, while being angry is not a sin, we are admonished to control it before it controls us and empowers the enemy to take hold of our lives.

So, what are we to do when we’re seething? Here are some suggestions. First, acknowledge it. Identify what you’re feeling angry about, then name it. For example—"I am feeling angry that I have to pay the bills by myself now!” Then, confess it to God. Yell it aloud to God if you have to—"God, I am so angry that you didn’t stop this from happening!” Then actively let it go (without hurting anyone, including yourself)—journal it out, cry it out, exercise it out, or talk it out with a therapist or a friend. Then, pray it out, saying—“God, I give this anger to you. Please help me with my grief.” Do these steps as many times as you need to.

God is not put off by our anger. Moses got angry. Jonah got angry. Peter got angry. Yet, God’s love for them never wavered, and they stayed in relationship with God. Instead of letting the enemy get a foothold through your anger, let your anger bring you closer to God.

Today’s Promise: Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city. (Proverbs 16:32, ESV)