Freedom Through Forgivenessنموونە

Forgiveness Benefits You

Forgiveness Is About You

Somewhere along the line, we came to believe that forgiveness was about the other person. I don't know where this idea originated, but many people believe it to be true. They think that they think they are "getting back" at the person who hurt them, but that is not the case.

I came across a TV show and heard this story. The host of the show said she was furious with someone who never apologized, so she stated that she would never forgive them. She said that they were not remorseful, so they didn’t deserve her forgiveness. And she left it at that.

One day, while shopping, she saw the person who had offended her. They were out and about, shopping and laughing with friends without a care in the world. When she saw this, she got mad. The rest of the day was horrible for her. She was in a bad mood, and it was rough altogether.

When she got home later that night, she was still mad but took a second to pause and think about the situation. What she realized is that her decision not to forgive did not affect the person she was angry with. She was the one who had a bad day, and the other person— from what she could see—was having a great time. That day, she learned that unforgiveness affected her, not the person that she was angry at.

"Unforgiveness is like drinking poison yourself and waiting for the other person to die." - Marianne Williamson

That is what she was doing. Holding on to unforgiveness messed up her day, not the other person’s.

If you have held unforgiveness in your heart for any amount of time, you have lived this. You have been hurting yourself, not the other person. Forgiveness is for your benefit! You are the one who lives your best life when you forgive.

Not Forgiving Is Bad for Your Health

"Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?" - Matthew 6:27 NKJV

Unforgiveness leads to worry, and worry causes stress on the body. Our bodies are designed to be carriers of His Spirit. When we become a Christian, God's Spirit comes to live in us as well. So really, our bodies were designed to be carriers of God Himself. When we try to use something in a way it was not intended, the results are never as good as what was intended.

When you choose not to forgive someone, your body doesn't handle it well. Unforgiveness brings stress to your body because it's simply not designed to deal with it. So, as a result, when you choose not to forgive, your body will respond in ways that are not healthy for you.

Effects on the Brain

According to Charles Stone (https://charlesstone.com/what-unforgiveness-does-to-your-brain/), "unforgiveness can keep our bodies and brains in a high state of alertness that the body is not meant to be in.

Unforgiveness can lead people to nurse and rehearse the hurt, which reinforces the negative emotions and burns the event and pain even deeper. It also affects the memory. When we remain stressed for long periods of time, our brain forgets things. Unforgiveness also amplifies negative emotions, causing us to derive pleasure from others experiencing pain."

Effects on the Body

According to CounsellingDirectory.org, (https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/memberarticles/unforgiveness-and-your-health),(Megase 2017)

Unforgiveness leads to

· Cancer – 61% of cancer patients have forgiveness issues

· Suppressed Anger – People that hold on to unforgiveness often get angry for any reason have issues associated with forgiveness

· Low Self-Esteem – People that hold on to unforgiveness lack of self-love stem from not forgiving yourself or self – acceptance

· People that hold on to unforgiveness deals with bitterness which increases the risk of depression

· People that hold on to unforgiveness constantly worry which increases the risk of sleep deprivation and anxiety

· High Blood Pressure

· Increased chance of heart disease

According to the Mayo Clinic(Staff 2020), they found that unforgiveness

· Brings anger and bitterness into EVERY relationship

· Prevents people from enjoying the present because they are stuck in the past

· Prevents people's lives from having purpose

· Causes people to lose valuable and enriching connections.

We can clearly see that unforgiveness is not good for us. We are not designed to hold on to grudges. It affects our mind, our body, and our spirit. To put it plainly, unforgiveness can be fatal, but forgiveness leads to healing.

Forgiveness Leads to Health

Here is a fundamental principle that we forget sometimes: When we live God's way, we get God's results. When we live our own way, we don't get God's results. Even if the results are good, doing it your way, God's way would have been way better. This principle applies here. If unforgiveness leads to unhealthy results on your body, forgiveness leads to life and health.

According to Everett Worthington in the Greater Good Magazine in 2004 (Everett L. Worthington 2004),

People who forgive have

· Higher Self-Esteems

· Better Moods

· Happier Relationships

According to the Mayo Clinic(Staff 2020),

Forgiveness Provides

· Improved Mental Health

· Less Anxiety and Hostility

· Lower Blood Pressure

· Fewer Symptoms

· A Stronger Immune System

· Improved Heart Health

This is simple. Forgiveness is something that we were meant to do. God knew that we would need this, so he commanded us to do it and gave us the capacity to do it. It can be challenging, but just because it's hard doesn't mean it's impossible.

I found that my life became happier when I chose to forgive. I felt better about myself. Holding on to unforgiveness fueled the negative self-image that I had about myself. My mood was better, and other relationships were strengthened.

When it comes to forgiveness, our well-being is at stake. High blood pressure may not be solely due to what you eat. The anxiety you have may not be coming from what happened to you, but it may be coming from the fact that you are still holding on to what happened. Whatever you are dealing with, make sure that forgiveness is part of the equation.