Ghosts in My NurserySample

Identifying the Ghosts

In the field of Infant Mental Health, ghosts in the nursery are generational issues that disrupt the bond between parents and their infants/children. Ghosts can be dysfunctional parenting patterns, generational curses, mental illnesses, or family traditions that affect a child’s development. 

Regarding Joseph and his brothers, Genesis 37:4 (KJV) says, “And when his brethren saw that their father loved him more than all his brethren, they hated him, and could not speak peaceably unto him.” Joseph’s brothers hated him even before he told them his dreams (Genesis 37:5). Joseph’s brothers were victims of the parenting pattern Jacob inherited from his own family. Preferring or favoring one child over the other was a parenting pattern in Jacob’s family (Genesis 25:28), and he repeated the pattern as an older parent. 

Have you ever wondered why Samuel, one of the greatest prophets of the Israelites, failed in his parenting? It is possible that he inherited his parenting style from Eli, the main father figure in his life (1 Samuel 2:12; 1 Samuel 8:3). Samuel and Eli walked in God’s ways. However, they both neglected training their children like Abraham. Abraham did not only walk with God as a role model for Isaac; he also trained his household (Genesis 18:19). 

While some negative family patterns are easy to identify, some patterns manifest subtly when we least expect them to show up. For this reason, it is important for new and expecting parents to emotionally and spiritually prepare for parenthood. That is, identify negative patterns in your family and enforce your victory over them before or when they manifest.

When I became a mother, I was a Christian, but I was spiritually and emotionally underprepared for parenthood. I started off raising my child with the mindset of an orphan because I lost my parents and grandparents before becoming a mother. I feared losing my child and emotional withdrawal became my coping mechanism. I wanted my child to be independent and not depend on me. While it is good for children to learn independence from parents at some point in their lives, a reliable and interdependent parent-child relationship is important in the early years of life. My adverse childhood experience was a ghost in my nursery

I am thankful that God opened my eyes to this ghost in my nursery through education, and He taught me how to address generational issues spiritually. The lack of knowledge or ignorance can destroy (Hosea 4:6). I pray that this reading plan will help you identify the ghosts in your nursery and teach you how to enforce your victory over anything that can interfere with your ability to train up your children in the way they should go (Proverbs 22:6). Training up a child begins in the formative years of life. We must make the best use of it.

Reflection: Are there patterns in your family you do not want to pass on to your children? Write them down and declare your victory over them.

Read and meditate on Galatians 3:13 and 2 Corinthians 10:4. Consider writing or printing out those scriptures and use them to enforce your victory over generational curses. 

Prayer: Heavenly Father, I thank you for the blood of Jesus. Thank you for setting me and my children free from the curse of the law. In the name of Jesus, I enforce my victory over generational curses. I call my family redeemed. In the name of Jesus, I bring into captivity every parenting mindset that transmits trauma to my children. I have been translated from the kingdom of darkness into the kingdom of light; therefore, I am empowered to walk in light. As I study God’s Word, I receive parenting instruction and grace to follow instructions in the name of Jesus. Amen