Healing Family Relationships Through RepentanceSample

After we have done the vertical work of repentance, it is time to do the horizontal work of repentance and confession with your family member. You may be in a situation in which you have no personal contact. In that case, do the vertical work of repentance and ask the Lord to prepare your heart for the day. He may make it possible for you to talk about these things with your family member.

Repentance is more than an apology. Too often, apologies are superficial exchanges of "the right words." Apologies can be superficial and fake. Repentance and confession are real.

There are five powerful ingredients we can include when we ask forgiveness from a family member:

1. Confess - We simply state the wrong thing(s) we did.
2. Acknowledge You Were Wrong - This is an extraordinarily powerful sentence when it comes from the heart. After you have confessed, just say, "I was wrong."
3. Express Regret - This is the step where we say, "I am sorry." We feel bad for how our words and actions hurt our family members.
4. Commit to Change - Repentance is a change of mind that leads to a change in behavior. Express your desire for God to help your future behavior.
5. Ask for Forgiveness - After you have walked through the first four steps, ask this important question, “Will you please forgive me?”

Taking these steps is not easy, but it opens the door to genuine healing and reconciliation.

Reflection Question: Which of the five steps of asking forgiveness is most difficult for you, and why? What might be holding you back from going to your family member to ask for their forgiveness?