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Healing From Sexual Shame

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Where Does Sexuality Come From? 

I think it’s important to recognize that there is a difference between sexuality and sexual sin. We are all guilty of sin, in one form or another. If we take Jesus’ words during his Sermon on the Mount to heart, we realize that we are all sexual sinners as well. Jesus said that just looking at another person with lust in our hearts is like committing adultery. This means that not one of us can claim to be wholly pure. 

But there is a difference between sexual sin and sexuality. 

Sex existed before the fall. It was not the original sin and, despite centuries of artistic depictions of Eve as a seductress, neither was sex the first temptation. Sex, as an expression of union in marriage, was part of God’s plan from the very beginning. In the same way, our sexuality—the desire to experience that union—is part of God’s good creation. While we often use our sexuality in sinful ways, it is not sexuality itself that is sinful. 

Why is it important to recognize this? 

In demonizing sexuality, we point the finger of blame at God and his creation instead of at the true source of our sin. Mark 7:20-23 says, “It is what comes from inside that defiles you. For from within, out of a person’s heart, come evil thoughts [and all sorts of sin, including sexual sin]; they are what defile you” (NLT). 

So it's what we do with our sexuality that matters.

Sexuality itself is part of God’s creation that he deemed “good” in Genesis, which means that you don’t need to feel guilty for the fact that you are a sexual being. 

In Psalm 139:14 we can see what the psalmist, David, believes about himself and God: that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. This includes our sexuality! Romans 6:6 tells us that, in Christ, we are no longer “enslaved to sin” (ESV). We have the ability, through the power of the Holy Spirit, to resist sin—including sexual sin. 

If we fail, and we will, we receive forgiveness through Jesus Christ. The finger of shame should not be pointed at God for creating us as sexual beings, but neither should it remain pointed at ourselves. After we repent of our sins, we find full and complete redemption in Christ. We can stop pointing fingers altogether and instead lift up holy hands, thanking God for his good work in creating us and for giving us the Holy Spirit to guide us.

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Healing From Sexual Shame

One of the most damaging messages coming out of the purity culture movement is that our sexual histories determine our worth. Those who have sinned sexually, or have been sinned against, were compared to used cars, crumpled roses, and chewed-up sticks of gum. How do we tackle these lies and face sexual shame with hope and gospel truth? This five-day study is meant to help start the process.

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