You will get through it.

No matter what season of single parenthood you are in, many find yourselves in a place you didn’t expect to be. Every single mom will struggle with parenting, finances, and spiritual/emotional health. You are reading this because you’ve found yourself in a financial crisis or deeply desire to avoid one. Finances are one of the leading causes of stress. It keeps us up at night and destroys friendships and relationships. One in three single parents in the United States lives in poverty; maybe that's you, or while you aren’t living below the poverty line, the financial crisis has hit you, nonetheless.

Managing finances as a single parent can be tough for even the most diligent budgeter. I want to stop for just a moment and remind you that you will get through this! You will! I’ve been homeless and worked dead-end jobs, making no money. I’ve lived in the projects, surviving on food stamps and welfare. I’ve robbed my children’s piggy banks. I know about destitution, but I am a living testimony of God’s faithful hand of provision in every season. This will not kill you. Now, I know it does not look good in the midst of this. Please don’t let budgeting and money management overwhelm you. Instead, "Honor the Lord with your wealth and with the best part of everything you produce" (Proverbs 3:9).

The truth is, I’m not going to tell you much that you haven't heard. It’s kind of like when we want to lose weight. What are we supposed to do? Watch what we eat and exercise, right? We know what to do, but we don’t do it. While this may not be new to you, this is a reminder of what you need to do to survive this time of financial pressure.

• Create a budget! One of the most difficult things for most families transitioning to a single-parent home is reallocating finances. Many apps and websites offer free budgeting tools. Take advantage of them. There can be no plan if you have no idea what is coming in and leaving your home.
• Evaluate your budget closely for 30-60 days. Once you have your budget on paper or online, evaluate your spending for the next 30-60 days. Keep track of everything. Two things will happen: first, you will be much more conscious of what you are spending and second, you can begin to trim your budget based on “wastes and indulgences."
• Trim the fat. This is the most difficult. There are necessities, e.g. food, transportation, and housing. Then, there are non-essentials, e.g.manicures, eating out, driving expensive cars, a home in an expensive location, private schooling, movie dates, name-brand clothing, coffee shop coffee, and more. If most of us evaluate what we spend money on, it is very easy to identify luxuries versus necessities.
• Begin some future planning. While this will look different for everyone, here are some examples:
  • Your immediate financial crisis may require you to find a job where you have not worked outside the home in ten years.
  • Maybe for others, who have been single moms before, you need to look at second jobs and at-home businesses to supplement the income.
  • For others of you, it means expanding your educational level to secure a career versus a dead-end job.

Points to Ponder:

• Compare your income to your finances. Can you identify what expenses you can decrease to “trim the fat” from your budget?