Heartwork

The Heartwork section is a focused time to descend from the mind into the heart. Begin now with this simple prayer: “Lord, I need you. Soften my heart. Reveal yourself to me.”

As you start this journey of sexual healing, ask yourself, “Am I truly willing to make pursuing God’s healing a priority above all else in my life over the next five days?” If so, consecrate this time of healing right now. When you make this commitment, you can expect plenty of distractions to arise. Your job might demand more time or energy, or your spouse, family, and friends may need more of your time. You may also find difficulty in fitting this plan into your daily routine. At times, you will ask, “Can I do this? Is there no end to this tunnel?”

You’ve entered into a spiritual battle, a time to turn to, not away from, God. You’ll want and need His power. You relied on your strength in the past, and it didn’t work. This time, rely on God. Be patient. No matter how hard it seems, the Lord won’t abandon you. Stay committed. You have God’s promise to transform you: “The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it” (1 Thessalonians 5:24).

Why Jesus?

If you only want to stop a sexual sin you hate, you do not need this plan. Continue trying behavioral modification techniques to take complete control of your life. Take a secular psychology class or read self-help books that tell you how to pull yourself up by your bootstraps and fix everything wrong with your life.

The premise of this plan is that those techniques will fail. This plan humbly guides you on the only true and lasting path to freedom. From my own experience and the experience of thousands of other Proven Men, I can tell you that if you want to live a purposeful and Proven life, you need Jesus.

You’ll remain trapped in sexual addiction unless you do two things:

1. Ask Jesus to be your Savior.
2. Permit Him to be Lord of your entire life.

Jesus as Savior

Allow me to explain Jesus in a way you might not have heard.

Many believe that Jesus came to earth to show us how to live a good life. That’s not why Jesus came to earth. Yes, Jesus surely did provide the best example. But He didn’t come here to show you how to live. He came to die on the cross and rise again as your Savior.

Jesus was and is God. He is the one who created the world. Jesus left heaven to take the form of a man about 2,000 years ago. Why?

When the Lord created man, He had a divine purpose for an eternal relationship with each one of us. However, the heavenly dwelling of God is perfect. God says nothing impure can enter heaven (Revelation 21:27). That’s a big problem because we all have sinned. A single sin makes us imperfect and ineligible to be in heaven. The Bible is clear that the penalty for a single sin is eternal separation from God (Romans 6:23).

It’s like we are all waiting on death row to be executed. I am sure your mother or father would gladly step in your place to pay your death sentence. But they cannot because they also have sinned and are on death row.

We all desperately need someone not on death row to be willing to take the punishment for us. Of course, that means they would have to live a sinless life. Do you see where this is going? Only God could live a sin-free life on earth. That’s why Jesus took on flesh 2,000 years ago. Being both man and God, Jesus did not commit a single sin (1 Peter 2:22; Hebrews 4:15; 2 Corinthians 5:21). The good news is that Jesus was willing to lay down His life for yours.

Jesus personally paid the penalty of your sin when He died on the cross. John 3:16 is perhaps the best-known verse in the Bible: “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” If you were the only person to have lived, Jesus would still have come to earth to die for you. It had to be that way. He loves you and doesn’t want you to perish or to go on living without Him as part of your life. Christ offers you His name and His righteousness to replace your sin-soiled life.

By living a perfect life, Jesus became an acceptable sacrifice and substitute for your sin. He conquered death by rising from the grave and returning to heaven. Now, when the death sentence is levied for your sins, Jesus stands in your place—provided you have accepted His gift of forgiveness occurring when you ask the Lord to dwell in your heart. When you die, the punishment of death must be paid; Jesus, who lives in you, has already paid it in full.

What do you need to do to ask Jesus to be your Savior? The Bible says, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). He won’t reject you. Everyone who turns to Jesus and believes in Him becomes children of God and inherits eternal life in heaven (John 1:12). This includes you and me, but you must personally ask for and accept the gift of forgiveness.

If you turn to Jesus and accept His shed blood as the perfect sacrifice and substitute for your penalty, you’re no longer considered impure, no matter what bad things you’ve done or will do. God, the Father, will not reject you because His Son, who now lives in you, has paid the penalty for all your sins.

Right now, go to God with a surrendered heart. Ask Jesus, who paid the death penalty due to you, to forgive you and to enter your heart. Ask Him for His grace and mercy. He wants to give it to you.

Salvation

To ask Jesus into your heart and accept God’s righteousness, pray something like this:

God, I know that I am a sinner and deserve death. I know that Jesus is God and that He died on the cross to rescue me from the penalty of my sin. Please forgive me. I receive the gift of eternal life, which comes solely from the perfect sacrifice of Jesus Christ for my sins. Jesus, I ask you to live in my heart and make it your permanent home. Take total control of my life. I choose to follow you and turn away from sin, including my former lifestyle. Thank you for loving me and forgiving me. I commit to following you forever. In your precious name, Jesus, I pray these things. Amen.

If you prayed this prayer with your heart, then congratulations! You’re my eternal brother in Christ. You’re free from the power of death. Jesus now permanently lives in you, and you’re God’s child.

Jesus as Lord

It’s now time to make Jesus the Lord of your life. That’s the key to sexual integrity.

You’ve taken an important step. You’ve realized that you can’t win the battle on your own. You’ve probably tried many times and failed, but you’re finally on the right track. This battle is not about using more of your power or even about overcoming bad influences. Instead, it’s a spiritual battle. The Bible teaches that “our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms” (Ephesians 6:12).

The only way to stop being a slave to sin, such as pornography, is to rely on Jesus Christ. These are more than just words. When you need forgiveness, power, and strength, you go to the source: Jesus. His power is available to you, so turn to and yield your entire life to Him.

The journey now begins, but you never travel alone! A glorious by-product of having an intimate relationship with God is victory over sins, including sexual immorality. Jesus desires to take control of your life and lead you in His holy and pure ways. The power of the Holy Spirit is ready, willing, and able to guide you to victory, but you must want to love and serve God more than your former selfish and prideful ways. You must start hating sin because it blocks your relationship with Jesus Christ.

Being a Proven Man is about making Jesus Lord over your daily life. Each day you wake up, give control to the Lord. Throughout the day, you test your thoughts and actions against the six PROVEN letters:

• Passionate for God
• Repentant in spirit
• Open and honest
• Victorious in living
• Eternal in perspective
• Networked with other PROVEN Men.

Prayer

Spend five minutes in prayer. Prayer can be simply talking to God. Picture the Lord with you right now (He is with you). Tell Him of your fears and struggles. Ask Him to open your heart to His healing path and give you His strength and power to wake up early each morning. Otherwise, set aside time each day to meet with Him and carry out your commitment to sexual integrity.

Don’t be discouraged if it’s hard to pray for five minutes without your mind wandering. New relationships take time to form. Stick to it, and keep talking to God to meet with Him. Set a timer if you need to, but do spend at least five minutes in prayer.

Here’s a helpful suggestion: Write down a short prayer or list prayer items, such as the name of a person to pray for or a situation or need on your heart.