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Single Today

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Surrender Tomorrow

Am I going to be single for the rest of my life?

I say I want to be, but do I really mean it?

Will I regret this when I’m older?

Am I getting old?

Is my window of opportunity for meeting someone closing?

Is there something wrong with me?

That was the conversation raging in my head as soon as I woke up this morning. Some version of those thoughts pops up in my mind most days—they’re on my greatest hits album. I’ll be out enjoying a great meal with good friends, but then I’ll get in my car and drive home, and the thoughts will strike out of nowhere.

I call it the tomorrow trap and I fall into it all the time.

Trap is the right word, isn’t it? No one plans their day around getting caught up in those thoughts. The tomorrow trap comes out of nowhere, like a poor, unassuming fawn unwittingly stepping into a bear trap.

The trap is a problem for everyone (regardless of relationship status), but the intensity is cranked up when you’re single. Or at least that's true for me. There are so many moments where I'm going throughout my day, enjoying being single, and then before I know it, I step into the trap.

I trade in being present in the moment for worrying about the future.

Psalm 118:24 is a phenomenal lifeline in those moments; it's my go-to verse for escaping the tomorrow trap: “This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.”

I love how simple it is. Today (with all its imperfections) is the day the LORD has made. You have a choice to make. You can either let your mind wander toward tomorrow or choose to rejoice and be glad right now.

You can let your mind drift to all the stressful situations that await you tomorrow or decide to rejoice today.

The tomorrow trap tries to convince you to check out of the present moment and panic about the future. Unfortunately, when you give into the trap, you miss out on everything today has to teach you.

The truth about today is you are loved, valued, and accepted right where you are. However, it can be challenging to see that and even harder to believe that because we can get caught up worrying that there's a time limit on that love.

Exercise

Memorizing Scripture is one of the best ways to really let it sink in. Before you go any further, take a few minutes to memorize Psalm 118:24.

“This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.”

Question to Consider

Why do you think your attention tends to drift toward worry about the future? What is one practical step you can take to remind yourself of Psalm 118:24 the next time you get preoccupied with tomorrow?

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Single Today

Ryan Wekenman has been a single pastor for over a decade. He found out how hard it can be to thrive where you are. Regrets from the past and fear of the future can make it tough to find peace in the present. This study will guide you through several passages that will help you conquer yesterday's regrets, ditch tomorrow's worries, and thrive right where you are.

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