6 Habits of Purposeful LeadersExemplo

Habit #5: Resisting

Our days are made up of hundreds of habits that illustrate the type of leader we are. Most of them are second nature. At one point the choice to carry out each action was a conscious choice, but after repeating it for days, or even years, it became a habit.

Some of our habits are good habits that we intentionally chose to bring us closer to God and to others. Conversely there are habits we chose as a quick fix to make us more productive, chill out after a hard day, or tune out the noise to create a moment of peace. Those choices may not have been bad as a single action (perhaps some are), but repeated daily, they move us farther from God and people.

We all have certain things that could distract us from growing closer to God. This requires paying attention to the atmosphere you have designed for yourself and noticing the habits you have developed that are keeping you from intentionally engaging with God and others. Then designing new habits to help you purposefully resist and engage.

As an illustration, if someone were to look at your bank account, would the things you spend the most money on represent what you want to care about most? If time worked as a bank account, would it prove you are spending your time on things that feel most purposeful? This isn’t about guilt, shame, or obligation. What we want to do is start seeing what we are giving our lives to and if that is not what we want, putting in habits that help us resist that which distracts us from being fully present with God.

Lately, I’ve re-developed an attachment to my phone. I need to know where it is always. If it buzzes, I run after it with an urgency I give nothing else. It is the first thing I look at in the morning and the last thing I check at night. Here’s the craziest part: no one needs me. I don’t have a job where I am on call. I’m not even great at replying to the messages I do get. I just have a fear of missing out. Ironically, it causes me to miss out on the most important thing: God. I can’t hear the whispers of the Holy Spirit when I am too distracted to listen. I can’t fully listen to people if my eyes look for my phone every time it buzzes. This is true in terms of colleagues or family members.

I’ve had to start reinstating habits of putting timers on my phone. Other people may take a social media break. Whatever you choose, be sure to replace what you are restricting with something that helps you draw closer to God. Instead of just setting your phone on a timer, plan to use that time to be intentionally present with God or others.

What distracts you from seeking God or being fully present for others? Is it the desire to be busy? Is it something that masquerades as more urgent than God or people? Is it an accidental self-focus? Or an unhappiness at your job? Something else entirely? What could it look like to establish a habit where you resist the things that distract you and replace it with something that causes you to intentionally engage with God or people? Keep in mind the thing you want to replace the distraction with is something that helps those around you thrive.