UnstuckSample

Getting Unstuck in Your Marriage 

Today we’ll look at the common struggle of being stuck with a partner in marriage. In our society the term stuck often refers to the feelings experienced in an unwanted or unwise marriage. That’s not the meaning intended in this Bible study. We’re assuming God brought you and your spouse together, and His intention is that no person or circumstance should tear you apart. In this context, being stuck means a couple isn’t going forward spiritually, isn’t growing emotionally, and isn’t meeting each other’s physical needs. Everything has ground to a halt, and you don’t know how to get unstuck. It’s time for some traction.   

1. Prioritize your marriage. 

Proverbs 18:22 reads: “A man who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.” When you find good things in life, you hold on to them. Your marriage is no different. Your marriage will grow in health in direct relation to how you are willing to prioritize it. 

2. Acknowledge your sinful bent.

Proverbs 12:4 and 27:8 highlight specific ways a husband and a wife bring sin into a marriage. Acknowledging you are both flawed sinners and need to turn to Christ individually and as a couple provides ongoing traction in a marriage. 

3. Rally when times are toughest. 

Proverbs 17:17 says “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a difficult time.” When times are the toughest you have an opportunity to provide unconditional love and support to your spouse. Take advantage of it. 

4. Let go of offense. 

In marriage a lack of forgiveness builds up over time to rob the relationship of traction. Big offenses seldom cause marital loss of traction; it’s the accumulation of little wrongs that haven’t been addressed. In marriage we need to learn to address our issues and overlook offense. As Solomon wrote, “A person’s insight gives him patience, and his virtue is to overlook an offense” Proverbs 19:11). 

5. Focused delight.

Proverbs 5:15-23 provides wisdom for how to help your marriage refocus on delight. In a healthy, tracking marriage, two people delight in each other. You may have romantically slipped into marriage, but choosing to delight in your mate maintains and strengthens your relationship. Proverbs 5 speaks of the deep intimacy of focused delight. Following the wisdom there leads out of the ditch and into the strength and traction God desires for our marriage.