Keeping Peace and Sticking Around

In deep community, we invest time, effort, and care into our relationships, even when it’s hard. As we looked at on day 2, we are called to agape love one another; unconditionally, sacrificially, and with deep care. This is the love that says, “I will love you even when it’s difficult, even when I don’t feel like it, and even when you don’t do the same for me.”

This is a covenant love, a commitment to each other that transcends feelings or conditions. In a covenant, we make a promise to be there for one another, even when it’s inconvenient or uncomfortable. A covenant relationship is not based on a contract where we only do things for others if they do the same for us. In a covenant, we choose to love, support, and stand by each other, even when things are tough.

When relationships are broken or strained, we are called to make every effort to restore unity. Ephesians 4:3 encourages us to “make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.” Not fake peace or superficial harmony, but real, genuine peace — a peace that comes from walking in love and forgiveness.

When we paint everything over with artificial peace, it can feel like we’re walking on eggshells around others. We may appear kind on the surface, but underneath, we harbor frustration and bitterness. And that’s not the kind of community we’re called to be part of. Deep community means building genuine depth, processing our feelings, and resolving issues so that we can love one another well, even in difficult circumstances.

Sometimes, it feels like it would just be easier to leave it all behind. Maybe you’ve thought about leaving that small group, team ministry, or even the whole church. The problem is, any hurt or underlying issues we’re carrying, we’ll end up taking with us wherever we go, and we’ll quickly find ourselves in the same situation.

The grass isn’t greener on the other side – it’s greener where we water it, where we’re intentional in growing good relationships, restoring unity, and standing by each other.

Reflect:

• Do any of your church relationships feel strained, or are you experiencing “false harmony” with others in the church? How might God be directing you to restore relationships?
• Are you considering leaving a part of the church or moving to a new one because of an issue? If so, be honest in asking yourself why. How could you instead be intentional with resolving the issue?