Prodigal Heart预览

How to Seek Total Restoration

One afternoon, I jumped in the shower and took advantage of the alone time to talk to God. I thanked Him and reassured Him that I trusted Him and His will. In that conversation I recalled something. The memories coming to the forefront of my mind had been buried in my subconscious for a long time.

These were memories that I had been sexually molested at age five. They hit me like a ton of bricks. I relived every memory as it came forth: the room, the sounds, the smells, everything. I’d fallen to my knees under the running water in the shower, feeling the impotence of that five-year-old girl. I remembered the faces of my molesters. I felt used, like damaged goods.

Then the Holy Spirit came over me like a blanket. I could hear the Lord’s sweet voice saying: “Forgive them. I helped you remember so you can be free. Now forgive them.” So there on the floor, naked and with nothing left, I forgave, and I was set free. That day I felt God’s embrace holding me together, restoring yet another broken piece of me. Restoration is such a beautiful thing, yet it is only possible when we let go and let God.