Submission in Marriage, an Outdated Concept?

As a woman, should I submit to a man? As a confident, independent woman, I find this idea difficult. Does this concept of submission still apply in times of emancipation and equality? Shouldn't a man also submit to his wife these days? Doesn't God want us all to be equal?

What does equality mean anyway? As women, we have the right to submit to a man. The Bible says wives should submit to their husbands as we submit to the Lord. This means we are obedient because we know God is good and has our best interests at heart. This requires an above-average level of trust because submitting to someone who does not have our best interests in mind can have very unpleasant consequences.

But suppose we already have difficulty submitting to our loving Father, who repeatedly proves that He deserves our trust. How are we supposed to have the same trust in a man who will eventually disappoint or hurt us? Not because he means harm but because he is human and makes mistakes. The concept that a woman should submit to a man also entails enormous responsibility for the man. God doesn't just give him a position of power that he can fill or exploit at will. Instead, He charges the man with establishing a divine order in his relationship with the woman and living it out every day. The man should love his wife with the same love with which Christ loved the church. This love is AGAPE love, not EROS love. Men are to love their wives unconditionally, not just for their attractiveness but also when they behave as the man wishes (cf. 1 Corinthians 13). We women are our husbands' brides, just as the church is the bride of Christ.

In this context, it is important to understand the meaning of submission. It does not mean considering oneself inferior or not being allowed to make one's own decisions. Submission means acting as equals in a partnership because both partners respect their roles and support each other. The love required of men is a sacrificial, caring, and respectful love that acknowledges the dignity and worth of the woman.

Next Step: Do you trust your partner so much that you can completely submit to him, or how can you improve your trust? If you are single, do you trust God enough to completely submit to Him? If not, what do you need to fully submit?