The Wholehearted Love You’ve Always WantedSample

Naming Your “Why”

What’s your dream for your relationships? What have you always longed for? Is it to have a partner to share life with? Or perhaps a fairy-tale romance fit for a top-ten spot on Netflix? It might even be finding your true purpose—why God created you—but you haven’t been able to sort through the mess in your life to find just what that is.

No matter what your dream is, the best place to start is by creating a personal plan or “My Why” statement. It is a statement of what you want out of life and why you are willing to do what it takes to achieve it. To put it plainly, it answers the question, "Why do you want to live wholeheartedly?"

To come up with a “My Why” statement, it’s important to carefully think through the following four questions:

1. Do you know how God sees you?

God sees you as someone He cares enough about that He sent His one and only Son to die for you. He sees only the very best, purest version of you, with all your sins wiped away as far as the East is from the West (Psalm 103:12).

2. Why is it important to you to love with your whole heart?

Wholehearted love is exactly that, loving with every part of your heart—nothing hidden, allowing yourself and someone else to have access to all of you. Think about what it would feel like to be loved fully and unconditionally for who you are at your core.

3. What kind of values will you hold on to in your dream relationship?

Values can play a huge part in our compatibility with another person, so understanding what is attractive to us, what would need to be worked on, or what would be a deal-breaker is key to understanding our relationships and loving wholeheartedly.

4. How would loving and living wholeheartedly impact the rest of your life?

Imagine just for a short moment that you could shed all your relational baggage, insecurity, and pain and be free to bless the world with your love and tenderness. Imagine how that version of yourself would be able to have relationships with God and others.

Now create a short “My Why” statement for yourself. Here is a sample that might help you with creating your own:

“I do this because I want to be wholly myself, the way God intended me to be. I want to be healed from past pain and walk in freedom so I can more fully give and receive love. I don’t want to be stuck when I could be free. This will have a positive effect on my joy, my health, my knowledge of God’s goodness, and my ability to reflect God’s light and love to others.”

Commit to reading your “My Why” statement every morning and/or night. Remind yourself of what is important to you.