Knives Can Be Safer Than Lips

Which would you rather have: a kiss on the cheek or a knife in your side? It depends on who’s doing the kissing and who’s doing the knifing! As Proverbs 27:6 explains, an enemy’s kisses are more dangerous than a friend’s knife, and sometimes an enemy’s lips are more menacing than a friend’s blade. How can we wound people to life rather than kiss people to death?

The Wounds of a Friend Are Faithful (27:6)

“Faithful are the wounds of a friend” (27:6). Jenny was concerned about Stella’s spiritual state. Over several months, she’d seen Stella make many excuses for not attending church and the young adult Bible study. She’d also stopped showing up for the city outreach program on Friday nights. Stella used to send Jenny texts about what she’d been reading in her Bible and asking how she could pray for Jenny. But these texts had also dried up.

Not wanting to hurt her, Jenny hadn’t raised her growing concern with Stella. But when she heard that she’d started dating a married man at her office, she couldn’t avoid confrontation any longer. After rejecting many invitations to coffee, Stella finally agreed to meet with Jenny, although she said she had only a few minutes to spare.

It was an awkward meeting, but Jenny soon plucked up the courage to ask, “Are you dating someone, Stella?” Looking down, Stella initially denied dating anyone, but as Jenny pressed her, she eventually admitted what Jenny had suspected. Knowing the time was short, Jenny took her straight to the Bible to show her how wrong this behavior was on so many levels. Eventually, Stella yelled at Jenny to stop and accused her of being unloving and a disloyal friend before gathering her stuff and storming out of the café, raging at Jenny’s lack of kindness.

Loving wounds are good wounds.

Isn’t it better to be kind to people?

The Kisses of an Enemy Are Fatal (27:6)

“Profuse are the kisses of an enemy” (27:6). When Stella got back to work, her colleagues saw how upset she was and asked what was wrong. When she explained how Jenny had hurt her so deeply, they all encouraged her to pursue her happiness. “If it feels right, it is right,” one assured her. Others complained, “Christians are always so condemning and critical of everyone else. What right do they have to tell other people what to do?”

They promised to take her out later to have a drink and party to make her feel better. One of them said they’d try to make sure that her married lover was there too. “We’ll cheer you up,” they promised. Stella felt better already and looked forward to spending Friday night out with her new friends.

Kindness can kill.

Changing Our Story with God’s Story

Which would you rather have: a kiss on the cheek or a knife in your side? A loving knife that cuts out sin is far safer and better for us than hate-filled lips that encourage us in sin.

In every age there are false prophets who say, “‘Peace, peace,’ when there is no peace” (Jer. 6:14). They are good at kissing, but the truth is missing. Let’s ask God to keep us from such killer kisses. Instead, let’s ask him and his servants to deal with us faithfully, even if painfully, and let’s do the same for others too.

Jesus preferred to be wounded by his loving Father than kissed by disloyal Judas. Jesus is a faithful friend to all his people, as demonstrated by his willingness to use his word to cut out the cancer of sin. May God keep us from receiving or giving kisses that kill.

Summary: How can we wound people to life rather than kiss people to death? Welcome faithful wounds and run from killer kisses.

Question: Which friend loves you enough to wound you? Who do you love enough to wound?

Prayer: Faithful Wounder, be my best friend by cutting out my worst sin.