Unlocking Patience

How to Become a Person of Patience

It’s always been said, from the time that I can remember, that it is dangerous to pray for patience. How could anything we pray for be “dangerous”?

What this saying really means is when we are aware of our impatient nature and ask God to change us into patient people, He will bring situations or difficult people into our lives to teach us to be patient. Instead of being hasty, we learn the value of waiting on Him. We begin to understand that offenses aren’t always personal.

We realize that it’s better to give people grace than a piece of our mind. And finally, the aha moment: when we love others as we love ourselves, we embrace the virtue of patience.

As we reach into our toolbox for our last few keys, we must pull out the key that unlocks our sense of patience. Have you ever watched time slip by slowly in an hourglass? In a sense, that’s what patience does for us—slows us down, takes us away from the “now” of immediacy, the insecurity of urgency, the demand to be served.

Patience teaches us the kind of slowed-down awareness we need in order to truly pay attention to ourselves, God, our surroundings, and the people we are meant to connect with.

Unlocking patience helps us to access our kindness potential in big and meaningful ways.

Why Unlocking Patience Is a Critical Key to Being Kind

“Patience is when you’re supposed to get mad, but you choose to understand.” —Anonymous

What is patience? According to the dictionary, it is the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset. I personally like dictionary.com’s definition of patience.

It says that patience is the quality of being patient, as the bearing of provocation, annoyance, misfortune, or pain, without complaint, loss of temper, irritation, or the like. I can really relate to this definition.

Especially the “or the like,” which is a fill-in-the-blank answer. No one is immune to being impatient. We all have those moments. But, living a lifestyle of being impatient, or as I like to call it, having a short fuse, is a detriment to being a kind person.

Impatient people are not kind people. That’s why unlocking patience in your life is a key to releasing your kindness.

When I think about kindness and patience, they work in tandem.

If you’re short with somebody, you’re certainly not patient. And when you’re blunt with someone, you come across as rude, not kind. I’ve certainly been guilty of this.

When Selfishness Rules, Patience Doesn’t

Like so many of our weaknesses in life, the root problem that drives us to be impatient is our own selfishness. I’m not talking about the times when we need to get somewhere quickly because of an emergency (such as taking a child to the doctor), and something is delaying us.

Instead, I’m talking about the kind of impatience that is a result of having our lives (including the people in our lives) and the world be the way we think it needs to be right now.

Impatience grows from a selfish thought process that makes our way, our needs, our desires, and our way of looking at things the dominant concern.

The intensity of our impatience tells us how much we think we need to achieve our own agenda rather than following God’s agenda and timing for our life.

Bottom line? When we put ourselves on the throne instead of God, we are not only impatient about everything and everyone but are clearly showing a lack of love for others as well.

What Does a Patient Person Look Like?

“I will not be distracted by noise, chatter, or setbacks. Patience, commitment, grace, and purpose will guide me.” —Louise Hay

What does a patient person look like to you? When someone once asked Dallas Willard to describe Jesus in one word, he said, “Relaxed.”

Man, I had to chew on that for a while. It cuts me to my core in today’s busy culture to reflect on this. I believe the perfect picture of patience would be found in Jesus’ time on earth. He never rushed anywhere.

In fact, He often took the “long way around” to encounter certain people at specific times. He walked miles and miles with His disciples, tarrying at various locations and ministering to people everywhere He went.

Jesus was on God’s timetable. He waited patiently, knowing that God’s timing was always the right timing. There are many examples in the Gospels of Jesus saying, “It is not yet my time.” Jesus’ agenda was His Father’s agenda, not His own.

The Bible shows that Jesus came to do His Father's will and was on His Father's timetable.

Jesus is the perfect model of what patience looks like. When you’re following God’s agenda rather than your own, you have perfect peace in waiting on God’s timing.

In Jesus’ economy, delays are God-sent. Please read that again, friend.

Reflect on being more patient and accepting of God's time today.